all my flights are booked for this summer.
pterodactyls: natface: schedule: May 25th— New York-London June 1st— London-Rome July 1st— Rome-Copenhagen July 8th— Copenhagen-London July 8th— London-New York Come join! Well, if you insist… [Throws a toothbrush and a stick of deodorant into a ziplock bag] All set.
As a woman, I know I have an expiration date.– Seriously, re-read this. I can’t decide whether to feel very sad for this woman or angry that she is promoting such a scary and damaging view of women’s worth as human beings. (via katoleary) Are we really outraged at this? Jesus Christ, it’s Julia Allison, we already know the woman is a complete...
I bet Ash could totally make a wedding with ‘Orland [sic] Bloom’...– Almost sent as a response to a group email I just got that contained a missing-letter typo…I figured, sure it can be taken as kind of mean-spirited, but why not show it to a whole bunch of people? New Tumblr character?
Scenes from movies/tv that feature a person... →
(via pterodactyls) I believe this is all about women losing one shoe. And was compiled by some very specifically-minded foot fetishists. Just because I just added 116 movies to my Netflix queue, that don’t mean nothin’. Stop giving me judgey-eyes.
Part of the reason that I was so depressed last week/weekend was that I was scared to death. My nature is not to be a hypochondriac, but something was going on that had my mind projecting to bad places…Well, I went to the doctor yesterday and it sounds like everything is fine. If it tells you how worried I was, that was my first trip to a doctor — not counting dental or...
Steve Wiebe sets Donkey Kong Jr. world record →
robhuebel: I love this guy so much. YESSSSSSS…Eat it, Billy Mitchell.
DEAR UPPER MIDDLE CLASS
pterodactyls: I’m making two big purcha$es this weekend give me your adviiiiiiice on record players and international flights. Dear Lowly Serf, How DARE you speak to us. Sincerely, UPPER MIDDLE CLASS
What I've been reduced to:
Struggling to remember if it was tonight or last night where I took a bunch of Motrin at about 9:00, so I won’t OD if I take a bunch now too. Turn to page 72 for the solution to The Case Of The When Did I Eat All Of The Motrins. Page 72: “It was last night. Hello, little orange friends. Get in my tummy.”
Here we are to gross up your Friday afternoon
me: he's a douche, and he DRINKS douche, and i don't like him
I don't like him either.
Mostly cause of that drinking douche comment. which even if not true is gross enough to taint my perception forever.
me: eww, taint.
Let’s just agree that there are two kinds of people in the world: Rip...– from the extended dance mix of “Rhythm Nation”
How could I have been so fucking stupid
All this time I’d been living my life not realizing that Richard Attenborough and David Attenborough are brothers.
pterodactyls: No one ever gets my Mrs Lincoln jokes. Have you considered moving on to Lindbergh kidnapping jokes? It’s 2009, Vicky, time to evolve.
My birthday is May 13th. →
Stop announcing that you’re 12. You’re going to get me in trouble. PIECE OUT, bedtime. T.
you feel rekt? from how good it was?
me: was it as good as Final Frontier?
Victoria: even better than Generations!
FUCK OFF WITH THAT
pterodactyls: it’s GREAT Okay, BUT…How were the de-aging effects on Patrick Stewart’s face?
Robert Rodriguez's 'Predator' Reboot Announced →
Didn’t he name one of his sons Predator?
Madonna - “Beautiful Stranger”